A Mighty Change of (more than just) Heart by Rachel Huffaker

“And now behold, I say unto you, my brethren, if ye have experienced a change of heart, and if ye have felt to sing the song of redeeming love, I would ask, can ye feel so now?” 1 Through the Atonement of Christ, we as humans in our fallen state can experience the phenomenon known as spiritual rebirth. People have described it as a burning with their bosoms, an “awaken[ing] out of a deep sleep. . . unto God”, and an ‘illumination by the light of the everlasting word”2 Whatever the feelings accompanying this change, the result is the same: an enlightenment to the truth of the gospel and a renewed sense of faith and fervor. However, the path to spiritual rebirth is not an easy one, nor one to be taken lightly.
As President Ezra Taft Benson stated, “repentance involves not just a change of actions, but a change of heart”3. Just because our actions change, it does not mean that we have “seen the light” or experienced a true change of heart like in Alma where “according to his faith there was a mighty change wrought in his heart. . .”4I have had numerous warnings by my parents to fix my attitude on certain things. Oftentimes, though, it is only my outward actions that change to appease my parents or escape punishment. However, in some ways, this is even worse than having an outward bad attitude. Holding negative feelings in my heart causes them to fester and make the bad attitude even worse internally, often with such byproducts as bitterness and resentment.
One such example of this was when I was in high school and I disliked my Sunday School teacher immensely. I would go to his class under the watchful eyes of my parents only to leave partway through and proceed to pursue my own interests. After my parents heard of my behavior, they told me that if I did not attend Sunday School, they would take my car away. Grudgingly, I stayed in the class, making sarcastic comments throughout, and rolled my eyes whenever any of my classmates gave a particular inane answer. This, too, was reported to my parents and I was told to behave in class OR ELSE (a parent’s favorite phrase, methinks). So I kept my mouth shut and sat silently, sullenly, resentfully through a class I hated. What I did not realize was that most of the problem lay inside me. As a result, I still cannot stand the sight or mention of this teacher.
After King Benjamin addressed his people, they all cried, “Yea, we believe all the words which thou hast spoken unto us; and also, we know of their surety and truth, because of the Spirit of the Lord Omnipotent, which has wrought a mighty change in us, or in our hearts, that we have no more disposition to do evil, but to do good continually.”5 Unlike me around my parents and/or teachers, they felt no desire to continue in their wicked ways. They harbored no secret doubts or resentments; their hearts were full of only a desire to do good.
“And now behold, I ask of you, my brethren of the church, have ye spiritually been born of God? Have ye received his image in your countenances? Have ye experienced this mighty change in your hearts?”6 If I were being asked this question, I am ashamed to say that I would have to reply, “No. I have not.” Changing my behavior is a titanic effort. Changing my mind is nigh-impossible. Changing my heart? Well, I would say it was impossible except that I have read the story of Alma the Younger. So, yes, there is hope for even me. I do not feel that my testimony would adequately sum up my feelings on the matter as it has been quite weak and underused as of late. So I will include a poem that I wrote instead.
A cage and bands of iron surround my crippled heart
The key to unlock the chest of my soul and the lock are far apart
My soul’s a secret garden and the walls are very high
My inner self’s chained to the ground when what it wants to do is fly
So Jesus, Savior, my one physician, heal my shriveled heart
Take what was once live and free and heal me.
The bands of iron melt away, search out the buried key
Release my soul, give it real air, please, my brother, heal me
Break down the walls with your love, break my chains with your grace
Restore sight to my blinded eyes so I may see your face.
And Jesus, Savior, my Redeemer, fix my broken soul
Take what once was beautiful and make me whole
Take every aspect of my life into a refiner’s fire
Fill my heart with so much love and my soul with deep desire
Let heaven open up my heart, I don’t even know where to start
Set my trapped life free and heal me
Help me Savior of my soul and heal me.

1- Alma 5:26
2- Alma 5:7
3- Ezra Taft Benson, “A Mighty Change of Heart,” Ensign, Oct 1989, 2
4- Alma 5:12
5- Mosiah 5:2
6-Alma 5:14