Encouragement vs. Discouragement

“ Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats.” [1] This quote suggests that although life is filled with challenges, it is vital that we maintain a positive attitude. The story of Nephi and the broken bow illustrates the importance of having faith and courage in the Lord through trials, rather than succumbing to discouragement and doubt.

As Nephi and his family were traveling through the wilderness looking for food, Nephi broke his bow and it seemed like they were destined to die in the wilderness. Some people in the group began so complain and question why God would punish them even though they were doing what He had asked them to do. In 1 Nephi chapter 16, Nephi described Laman and Lemuel's reaction to this harship they were facing: “And after I did break my bow, behold, my brethren were angry with me.” [2] He noted other characteristics of their discouragement as well, stating that they were fatigued [3], murmuring [4], complaining [5], and fearful [6]. All of these are outward signs of the discouragement they felt because they had let this challenge defeat them instead of looking to the Lord for help and strength. On the other hand, Nephi remained encouraged despite this hardship. Verse 28 describes him as having faith, being diligent, and heeding to the word of the Lord.

Just as Elder Holland stated in a recent CES fireside, even the most faithful members of the Church will inevitably face difficulties and struggles during their lifetime. We may not have the challenge of being unable to obtain food, but there is a great deal we can learn from Nephi and his brothers on how our response to these trials is crucial to our happiness and success in life.

We have each been frustrated when an obstacle is put in our path even if we are simply trying to follow God's commandments. It is easy to get down on ourselves, but we must overcome this feeling of discouragement. Elder Marvin J. Ashton stated, "One of Satan's most powerful tools is discouragement. Whisperings of 'you can't do it,' 'you're no good,' 'it's too late,' 'what's that use?' or 'things are hopeless' are tools of destruction. Satan...wants you to quit trying. It is important that discouragement is cast out of [our lives]. This may take a decided amount of work and energy, but it can be accomplished." [7]

We are given challenges so that we can grow as we overcome them. God will never require us to face something that is too hard for us to bear. He has promised that even in our trials, He will be right beside us. “Verily, verily, I say unto you, ye are little children, and ye have not as yet understood how great blessings the Father hath in his own hands prepared for you; And ye cannot bear all things now; Nevertheless, be of good cheer, for I will lead you along.” [8]

In the scriptures we learn of God's feelings about discouragement in the story of the Israelites who murmured because they were lusting for flesh instead of manna. “When the people complained, it displeased the Lord: and the Lord hear it; and his anger was kindled; and the fire of the Lord burnt among them.” [9] One way for us to ensure that we don't fall into the trap of discouragement is to be grateful for what Heavenly Father blesses us with. Alma 34:38 gives us this counsel: “humble yourselves even to the dust, and worship God, in whatsoever place y may be in, in spirit and in truth; and that ye live in thanksgiving daily, for the many mercies and blessings which he doth bestow upon you.”

Last summer I spent several weeks in a small town in Mexico on a humanitarian trip. While I was there I witnessed firsthand the impact your response to trials can make on your level of happiness in life. During my time there I visited the homes of numerous impoverished women who were facing incredible challenges in their lives. In one of the homes lived an 87-year-old woman and her daughter and granddaughter. Their situation was precarious. The home was made of tin, cardboard, and scraps of wood. Each day they struggled to find food, obtain clean drinking water, and provide themselves with the basic necessities of life.

Despite this difficulty, the grandmother remained encouraged. She constantly tried to work for a better life and did all she could to avoid the rut of discouragement. She had terrible arthritis that prevented her from using her hands, yet she refused to let this disability drag her down.

On the other hand, her daughter often let these challenges defeat her. She was unwilling to find a job even though she was capable of working. She complained almost constantly about her circumstance. Overall, her countenance was very dreary. I wondered which of these two women I would be more like if I were placed in their shoes. Their lives were so difficult and I could understand how hard it must be to keep a good attitude.

As I observed the differences in the lives of these two women, I realized the huge difference your response to trials makes. The grandmother was infinitely more pleasant to be around than her daughter because of her cheerful attitude. Her example instilled in me a desire to choose to follow the Savior's example of casting out discouragement so that I will be filled with happiness.

It is crucial that we follow the perfect example of the Savior. He suffered greater trials than we will ever experience, yet he did not once get discouraged. “Even with such a solemn mission given to Him, the Savior found delight in living; He enjoyed people and told His disciples to be of good cheer. Remember the unkind treatment He received, the rejection He experienced, and the injustice He endured. When we, too, then face some of that in life, we can remember that Christ was also troubled on every side, but not distressed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed.” [10]

-Merrit Denison

[1] Voltaire
[2] 1 Nephi 16:18
[3] 1 Nephi 16: 19
[4] 1 Nephi 16:20
[5] 1 Nephi 16:22
[6] 1 Nephi 16:27
[7] Elder Marvin J. Ashton, Conference Report, April 1988
[8] D&C 78:17-18
[9] Numbers 11:1
[10] Elder Jeffery R. Holland, “This Do in Remembrance of Me,” Ensign 1995